Loading ...Posts Tagged ‘criminal fail’
Smuggling Fail
WASHINGTON - A U.S. Border Patrol agent who tried to import rare tortoises in a box labeled “scorpions” pleaded guilty on Tuesday to animal-trafficking charges, the Justice Department said.
Again, we have a law enforcement official that isn’t smart enough to get away with anything himself. How can we expect these guys to catch criminals when actual criminals are smarter than they are? He was a Border Patrol agent that didn’t know it was illegal to import scorpions, for fuck’s sake. Whatever he ends up getting, I vote we add a public flogging.
Home Security Win
APPLETON, WI — A Grand Chute woman who chased a burglar and bit his hand got a big enough piece of him to provide a DNA match that led to his arrest, authorities say.
This lady should get a medal. It’s nice to have someone go all “Your dumb ass broke in my house?” on some idiot criminal once in a while.
Original Article at the Green Bay Press Gazette
Bail Fail
A man who went to the Livingston Parish Detention Center to bail a woman out of jail ended up behind bars himself, Livingston Parish deputies said Friday.
Harvey E. LeBlanc, Jr., 29, who listed his address as unknown, was arrested after a search by deputies found both methamphetamine and marijuana in the vehicle in which LeBlanc was sitting in the jail parking lot, said Perry Rushing, chief of operations for the Sheriff’s Office.
Yeah, it’s probably not a good idea to take a bunch of drugs to the jailhouse. A couple tweakers should know better. Wait, they probably did…but they’re fucking tweakers and either forgot or figured they were so slick they could get away with it. Meth kills, people. And if it doesn’t kill it makes you as stupid as these guys, which is arguably worse than death. I hate tweakers like Cartman hates hippies, and I’m always happy to shine a light on their brain damage.
Piracy Fail
Pirates who attacked a ship off the coast of Somalia got more than they bargained for when it turned out to be a naval vessel - from an international force against piracy, Nato said.
Nice work guys
Mugging Fail
HARRISBURG, Pa. (AP) — A retired police chief said he was robbed by “probably the dumbest criminal in Pennsylvania,” at a police officers’ convention on Friday morning.
By all means, while executing your brilliant plan for the perfect crime, fail to notice the signs everywhere announcing the cop convention.
